"A SHORT WALK ON A LONG PIER"

[Itchy]

"A SHORT WALK ON A LONG PIER" or "A LONG WALK ON A SHORT PIER"?

( OOC: This is the full name of the thread, but it's too long I'm going with Hedge's suggestions, but putting both of them both together for that kinda classic Rocky and Bullwinkle way It's a continue of A Dog eat Dog world by the way.

It's a beautiful night, the stars are shinning and the moon is glaring over the water. Itchy walks outside of the large boat know as Carfaces Casino on to the deck leading to the shore

Itchy talks to himself

Gee, whata nice night for a walk on the pier, I wonder if Hedge likes me? I mean she probaly likes big strong dogs, like Carface's thugs, with muscles, guns, and knifes! And monsters in there basements! Oh..Well maybe not that...Ehh, boy she sure is nice though, I don't know if I could tell her that I like her, she would probaly just laugh at me....

Itchy looks at the water with the moon glaring over it, he stares at his face glowing over the water.

What have I got but short legs, fleas, and a red basebal cap??...

Just then a large green blur swims right under the dock where Itchy was standing

AHHHH! WHAT WAS THAT!?!?!

Itchy looks under the deck and just sees a large tail swim away, Itchy then sracthes his head.

I hope I don't ever find out what that was!

Itchy then hops up on some crates and waits pasently for Hedge and Killer to come out, Itchy also hopes that his boss Charlie will come too, to give Itchy a few tips on women....Will Itchy ever learn?

[Killer]

Killer slinks out of the casino in a nervous, fretful mood, though he tries to conceal it by avoiding eye contact and keeping his mouth shut for the most part. Of course, he's still stewing over his argument with Charlie. Oh, how he despises that mutt! It really started after that time he and Itchy howled in his ears, taking advantage of his unfortunate predicament. He doesn't favor Itchy much for that either, the only difference is, Itchy doesn't constantly rub his fur the wrong way, nor does he pose much of a threat.

"I may be a bit outta shape, but at least my legs are longer," he mutters with a slight snicker, "If that lil' wiener dog ever tried to pull somethin' on me, all I'd hafta do is outrun him and that'd be a cinch."

Truth be known, deep down, Killer can relate to Itchy. They seem to share a common ground and point of view, though Itchy does draw the line with Charlie at times. Killer wouldn't dare do so with Carface. He knows what will happen if he ever does. Still, he has the same stubborn streak that surfaces in Itchy once in a while, though his stubbornness never really goes beyond incoherent muttering as he reluctantly does his boss's bidding. Tonight, as he nears the place where Itchy stands waiting for Hedge, he picks up part of what the little dog had been muttering to himself about his short legs, fleas, and baseball cap.

"You've got one up on me," he remarks in a weary tone of voice as he sits down nearby, "At least you're not fat and, believe me, you have no competition in Carface's gang. Hedge doesn't care for any of 'em. If they're not completely stupid, they smell like rancid garbage."

As that all too familiar green form slithers under the docks, Killer can feel the hairs along his back stand on end. He knows very well who it is and he's certain Carface would recognize it in a heartbeat. He shudders and shakes of the momentary fear-triggered paralysis, but keeps his distance from the edge of the dock.

"Hey, Itchy, I'd get away from the edge if I was you," he suggests, trying to hide the fear in his voice by putting on a cynical attitude, "Of course, if you insist on hanging out over there, I could get the ketchup and relish so's the green monster can have a hot dog for dinner. Then again, it's pretty cool tonight, so I guess he'd be having a chili dog instead."

He snickers at his own joke, but trembles again at the thought of the alligator surfacing for a snack. The whole idea makes him feel faint, but he's not quite as scared of the alligator as he is of the blood-thirsty piranhas in the pit in Carface's office.

[Itchy]

YIPPP! I didn't know you were listening! Killer ya such a sneek!!!! Plllllllllleeeeeeeease don't tell Hedge the stuff i said! please!

Yeah...that Green thing? what the heck was that, i hope i never know! seeing that your FAT! As you said so your self, i think it would rather eat YOU!

Is Hedge cleaning up inside?

[Killer]

Killer slumps in defeat, not really taking offense to Itchy's comment, though it stings. He has no real desire to carry on an argument at this hour, but he will say something in defense.

"Well, think about it," he shrugs, "Your boss is thin--you're thin. My boss is fat--I'm fat. Y'know what that says for us? We're nothin' but a couple of lame-brained followers."

Now there's true-blue proof Killer must be tired and delirious. He never speaks anything bad about his boss and saying he's a lame-brained follower is saying little more for Carface.

"It's a alligator," he answers Itchy's question about the green thing, "The boss knows him real well, trust me. And I won't say nothin' to Hedge. I'm not that big of a weasel. I won't meddle in that kinda stuff...unless Carface orders me to."

[Itchy]

Unless Carface orders you too?!!?! That's all all Carface orders you ta do, ya snitch!...Ehh, well I guess I don't have a choice do I?...I'll take your word for it...

Well, anyways, Killer, thanks for finding my hood ornament back there, it's one of my favorites and it's really rare...And it's...Umm, ok, let me tell you something, that hood ornament isn't really a hood ornament...It's a hubcap, and it not really rare...Charlie broke my Royes Royce hood ornament years ago, he felt bad, so I guess" he stole the next best thing" for me! Well, it's the thought that counts, so it's still very speacil to me, he stole it from Carf...

Itchy then relises who he is talking to an catches his tounge so Killer dose not find out it was his bosses hub cap that Charlie stole years ago

Car dealership...He stole it from a car dealership long ago! But they are all over the place, I mean you and I both know as well as anyone that Carface has millions of them! I mean even if one was missing, he'd never know it! Not that any of them are missing or anything....Umm, ALIGATORS! DID YOU SAY ALIGATORS!!!


OOC: Dom Deluise says that same line in the Muppet Movie Don't ya guys just LOVE my new sig! Thanks for making it for me Killer! LOL!

[Hedge]

OOC: HEY ITCH! OUT OF CHARACTER I LIKE YOUR THREAD TITLE... WHERE DID YOU COME UP WITH THAT??? I DO NOT LIKE THE FAT MAN WITH THE UGLY TEETH THO!!!! YUK! ITCHY IS SO MUCH CUTER with his little butt popping up and down at the piano!!!!

BIC: *Hedge goes to find Carface to let him know she's going to be stepping out for awhile... and just to cover Killer's butt (big as it is) she decides to tell him that she wants Killer along for protection... or better yet, company... protection, would be stretching it a bit... and she's definitely not going to tell him she's going for a walk with Itchy and possibly, Charlie... the poor fat booger would probably have a heart attack... hmmmm, maybe she should tell him that! (Just kidding, Carfy!) You ma bud!!!*

"Carface? Where are you? I need to speak with you for a minute!"
*No answer. Hedge decides to leave a note which says.... Gone for a walk on the pier... took Killer along with me for COMPANY... if I see the gator, I'll give him your regards... Hedge.*

[Carface]

Hey Hedge get back here. You idiot pear where were you!!!! Where is Hedge and where ya?!! Wha_ what was that!It was green and slimey? Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!! The King Gator !!! Carface is so scared he jumps in Killer's arms and wets his fur.

[Killer]

Killer's ears perk and he suddenly takes an extreme interest when the conversation shifts to the subject of hubcaps. As Itchy starts stammering and acting nervous, he can't help but become suspicious.

"Well, Carface ain't missin' any hubcaps. He doesn't collect 'em," he states coolly...just before getting a little bit aggressive, "But I do! I thought there was somethin' familiar about that one stuck to your butt. My favorite hubcap has been missing for years!"

Killer is just about to unleash whatever wrath and violent behaviour he has on Itchy when he suddenly finds Carface in his arms, apparently having caught sight of the alligator swimming under the docks.

"Ew...gee, Boss, you need to learn to contain yourself," he grimaces in disgust as he dumps Carface on his rump, "Aren't you a lil' old to be peeing on yourself when you're scared? I out-grew that sorta thing a looooooooong time ago. Puppy stuff. Blech!"

He brushes himself off and turns back to Itchy, getting in his face until they are nose to nose and eye to eye (Killer has to get down pretty low to be on Itchy's level though).

"Now...about that hubcap..." he snarls wickedly.

[Itchy]

Itchy is very nervus about finding out the information that Killer collects hub caps, Itchy is also scared about the aligators, Itchy at first does not know what to say when killer is up or down in his face. Itchy then thinks in his head....What would his pal Charlie do? ;D


Itchy gives a gruff growl and pushes Killer back, Killer thus landing on his fat boss carface. ;D


Listen! Its my hubcap! Charlie got it for me! If you have problems with it, you take it up with him! Grrrrr, Ruff!

Just then the aligator swims by again,Itchy then jumps ontop of Killer...who is on top of Carface creating an all dog totum pole...LOL!





Although the dogs are scard they really don't have anything to worry about, well maybe Carface does, the king Gator is just takening a swim and will likey disipear into the deep bog soon


Itchy jumps down and desides he better get away from Carface and Killer as they have just been squished by him. Right now Itchy has the chance to because Carface and Killer are in a little bit of a stary daze, but soon carface will mostlikey be really mad and Killer must be mad too when they come out of the daze


Itchy quickly trots down the dock to the shore and desides he better hide in an old tree with a look out hole to see if Hedge and or Charlie comes out of the boat soon, he knows he will be safe with either of them.


OOC: lol Killer you mook! you always gotta change things around!!!!lol Hey Hedge, thanks for the title, but i'm gonna keep the weird guy for a little while, i find his wart more ugly then his teeth! LOL! i just get a kick on how discusting he is, don't worry, ill get discusted with him soon and change it back to good old Itchy, i wanna see what Charlie says if he sees it;-)

[King Gator]

:-*Thrashing his long green tail wildly, King Gator nosedives then turns straight upwards in the water, surfacing right in front of the two doofy looking dogs piled on each other, searching for the little guy with the baseball cap, but not seeing him knows these two fat bozos will do

"Hellow fellas... have ya mist me?"

:-*The gator smiles real big at the two dazed dogs, loving the feared look in their faces. Can't contain himself and breaks into song

[Charlie B. Barkin]

OOC: L :)L! Wow...now we have a King Gator? Welcome to the board, KG! ;D We're glad to have you! Well...Carface and Killer might disagree with that, but... L :)L @ the guy from the racetrack betting stand! That's funny!

BIC: Charlie comes slinking out of the casino, still angry about Killer and Hedge and the flat root beer. He growls as he sees the whole lot of them, now including Carface. His ears perk as he hears Killer get on Itchy's case about the hub cap and he's about to go over and put the old mutt in his place when the King Gator beats him to it. "Whoa!" he jumps, then grins evilly as the huge reptile stares the two bad dogs down, "Hey, KG, my brother! How's it going? Are you...hungry?" He wiggles his eyebrows and gestures toward Carface and Killer, then calls to Itchy, "Hey, Itchy! Get back here! You're going to miss all the fun of watching these two saps become the main course!"

[Hedge]

*Hedge walks toward the pier and perks up her ears as she draws nearer and hears all the commotion... picks up her pace...*

"Hey, what's going on here?" *Eyes turn very big at the sight of the singing alligator* "Whoa! What a big guy! It figures he'd be a friend of yours, Charlie... "

*Catching him off guard, Hedge whams into the back of Charlie's legs knocking him on his kiester*

"Knock off the garbage, Charlie..." angrily Hedge takes a stance in front of Charlie..."You weren't always such a good guy yourself, you know, and by the looks of things, you're reverting back to that rotten dog you used to be... Revenge doesn't pay, Charlie... it never has and it never will..."

*Hedge turns to Carface and Killer, who are cowering before the great green gator... thinks a minute, then begins to strut up and down the pier singing, "Let Me Entertain You" in a boomba beat*

[Killer]

Killer struggles to regain his footing and get off of Carface as quickly as his age (and weight) will allow. He starts to go after Itchy, intent on retrieving his hubcap, when the King Gator surfaces. Killer is immediately frozen in fear as he turns extremely pale...and falls on his back, out cold.

[Itchy]

Itchy looks out the hole of the old dead tree trunk and can't belive what he is seeing! He sees Charile and Hedge, and finds it weird that charile is saying everything is alright, still Itchy is worried about ALL of them but mostly his new friend Hegde and his old pal and boss Charlie.

Itchy yells out the tree trunk gaining nerve Look out hedge! i'll save you!!!!

Itchy jumps and trys to fit out of the small look out hole rather then going backwards out of the tree trunk where he when in, Itchy becomes stuck in the hole and then the old tree trunk SNAPS! and lands into the bog water muck that is like quicksand in which the tree was at the edge of the shore where the dock starts. The tree trunk is quickly sinking.

OH NO!!!! CHARILE! HEDGE! EVEN CARFACE!!!!! HELP!!!!!SOMEBODY! ANYBODY!!!!! MAYDAY!!!!! HEEEELLLLLLP!!!!!!

OOC: it seems that maybe the gator isn't going for a midnight swim but midnight SNACK! Is it someone new or is someone playing two characters? heck, maybe l'll come in later or another time as the fat old werid guy....LAUGH OUT LOUD!!!So funny I HAD to spell it out!!!!!! Oh...it looks like Itchy is in trouble yet again in another role play at the same time...."sigh" Oh Itchy....

[Hedge]

LOL! THIS IS TOO FUNNY!!!!

OOC: I'm trying to imagine if Itchy has gone into the water in the tree trunk, face up or butt up... he won't just have a hubcap stuck on his butt, but a gator!!!! I don't know who the gator is, but welcome aboard, King G!!! This rp is almost as good as the movie... Thanks everybody for making me laugh when I've felt like crying...

BIC: *Hedge stops singing as all eyes turn towards the tree with Itchy's voice screaming... forgetting her anger for the moment, she gives Killer a quick slap on the face to wake him, (that was fun) and then begins running towards the tree... keeping one eye on King Gator who seems to be mesmerized with her voice....*

OOC again: Itchy, you and Killer both have some quick comic relief stuff... Thanks to both of you for your sense of humor... not to mention the cranky Carface!!!